For Men Who Are Tired of Hurting, Guessing, or Pretending They’re Still 25

Welcome to the STOP BREAKING YOURSELF™ Men’s Swag Collection, created for the men who are aging boldly, aging loudly, and aging with a suspicious number of mystery pains. Whether they’re 30, 40, 50, or “don’t ask,” this collection celebrates the guys who are finally ready to laugh about getting older instead of pretending they can still do a cartwheel.

Inspired by the brutally honest and hilarious book “Stop Breaking Yourself: A Man’s Guide to Aging Smarter,” this swag line brings that same energy — humor, truth, practicality, and a gentle roast — into gear men will actually wear and use.

Perfect for husbands, dads, uncles, grandpas, gym bros, tired bros, and any dude who realizes his body is sending warning signals like an old pickup truck with duct-taped headlights.

🧢 WHAT’S IN THE COLLECTION

👕 Shirts & Hoodies — The Truth You Can Wear

Comfortable, durable, guy-approved designs like:

• “Stop Breaking Yourself™”

• “Aging Smarter, Not Harder”

• “Warranty Expired, Still Running”

• “Sir, That Noise Was You”

• “Dad Bod In Progress / Completed / Maintaining”

• “Midlife Crisis Prevention Unit”

Perfect for gym days, errands, coaching kids, lawn mowing, or ignoring chores.

🧢 Hats, Beanies & Trucker Caps — For ‘I Just Rolled Out of Bed’ Hair

Featuring bold, simple, very “man” designs:

• “Aging Smarter™”

• “Not Dead, Just Tired”

• “Stop Breaking Yourself™”

• “Knees Optional”

Provide shade for outdoor chores they didn’t actually want to do.

☕ Mugs, Tumblers & Water Bottles — Hydration for the Falling-Apart Years

Help him drink more water (because apparently that’s a struggle):

• “Back Pain Fuel”

• “Aging Like Milk”

• “Men’s Manual: Read It”

• “Coffee First, Complaints Later”

🧴 Self-Care Items for Men Who Never Self-Care

Add-on items for gift baskets like:

• Muscle rub tins

• Beard balm

• Foot repair cream

• “Old Man Recovery Kit” mini packs

All labeled with humor he’ll love and instructions he’ll actually follow.

🧼 Stickers, Keychains & Accessories

Great for gym bags, toolboxes, laptops, and work trucks:

• “Warning: May Make Dad Noises”

• “Built Tough, Aging Rough”

• “Premium Vintage Male”

• “Handle With Care”

💥 THE VIBE

• Masculine

• Funny

• Straightforward

• Relatable

• No-nonsense

• Big Dad Energy

Perfect for men who can laugh at themselves… or need to.

🎁 WHO IT’S FOR

✔ Husbands & partners
✔ Dads
✔ Middle-aged men in denial
✔ Men who’ve started making the “grunt noise” when they stand up
✔ Guys who secretly like cute merch but will only wear it if it’s “man enough”
✔ Anyone getting the Stop Breaking Yourself™ book as a gift

🎉 THE SWAG THAT MATCHES THE BOOK

This collection reinforces the message every man needs:

You’re not broken.
You just need better habits, better humor, and better swag.